Amazon Buyers Are The Scum of the Earth

Alright, so there I was, with an unused electronic device. I need to sell it because I didn’t need the damn thing. So I was like, oh shit, I’ll sell it on Amazon. It’ll be simple.

Little did I know I would be in for an ass raping nightmare. So some bitch ordered this product. We’ll call her Dickhead to protect her identity.

Now this camera I sold was devoid of damage. No scratches or anything. It was basically like new. I packed it well in its original box when I sold it. Imagine my surprise when the moment Dickhead received her package, she said that there was a scratch on the rear screen and she wanted a refund or replacement.

Well Dickhead, it sounds like you planned this out from the start, huh? Because I had no replacement and was a new seller, she must have been angling for a partial refund from the start. I offered her $10 right off no questions asked. She responded in what I imagine was a hambeast demeanor, “OHHOHOH $10? You need to offer at least $70.” At this point I knew she was a dickhead, and rescinded my generous partial refund offer and told her to fuck off. She cried in the reviews how I had never offered her even a partial refund. My face when I don’t even give a damn.

Now this wasn’t the only retard I encountered. Just like the real Amazon Rainforest, you never know what kind of shit or flotsam you’ll find. So this other time I was selling another electronic device which had a memory card slot. Imagine my surprise when some dude in Afghanistan orders it. I almost thought it was a joke, but it wasn’t. So basically I mailed the damn thing off (hooray for $10.50 USPS Afghanistan shipping). Some days later I get a disjointed email in all CAPS, “WHAT IS THIS I WAN AT A REFUND NOW THE CARD SLOT DO NOT WORK!!!!!1111ONEONEIAMRETARDEED!!11111!!1 YOU RIPPED ME OFF HOW DO I MAIL THIS BACKA.”

Once again, I smelled the scent of retard from an ocean away. It was especially easy this time because as well all know, people in the military tend to have less higher education, and people with less education are less intelligent in general.

So I knew fairly well the card slot was working because I had tested it prior to mailing, so I calmly walk him through how to insert the card into the card slot. An email later he rages that he has used card slots before, and this one does not work. So I tell him to flip the card around or push harder down to engage the locking mechanism. An email later he informs me in what I imagine was a sheepish mood, that he had figured it out.

Guess that’s why you’re in Afghanistan, buddy! I hate to say it, but let nature take its course. If you’re retarded enough to join the U.S. Army to invade foreign countries with no justification, I guess it makes sense that you can’t work out how to use a memory card slot.

The world is in dire need of eugenics programs to breed this dishonest and stupid filth out of the gene pool. We already have the military. All we need now are liberal eugenics programs.


About tomrants

I'm Tom. Is it my real name? Who knows. Probably not. This is where I vent and rant about stuff that pisses me off.
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2 Responses to Amazon Buyers Are The Scum of the Earth

  1. MORAN says:

    LOL fucking retarded ass Amazon buyers. Stupid bastards. “I ordered it but I don’t want it, I send it back and you give me full refund just because, I don’t give a shit that you lose postage costs and Amazon fees even though you did nothing wrong, herp de durp I leave negative feedback too, hurr durr de dopp der dop”


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